Nick Valentine
Created by Matthew McBride

Okay, so this guy, this St. Louis shamus NICK VALENTINE? He ain't no Goody-Two-Shoes.

In his one appearance to date, a dark, violent, over-the-top hoot called Frank Sinatra in a Blender (2011), he's revealed as a guy who's not afraid of getting his hands extremely dirty or wallowing in the muck of St. Louis's criminal underworld -- an surreal, hyped-up underworld populated with colourful whackjobs with monickers like Big Tony, English Sid and Johnny No Nuts.

And don't even get me started on his partner, Frank Sinatra (no, really).

But there's something sort of endearing about the booze-stoked, Oxycontin-snorting Valentine, and the way he (more or less) keeps his head, when everyone else around him is losing theirs. almsot, er, literally...

If it's intended as parody of neo-noir, deal me in. If it's supposed to be taken straight, somebody alert the authorities. Somebody should really look into this Mr. McBride.

UNDER OATH

• "The magic of this book is to read it as I did, fresh and in the dark. Trust me, you will be fully rewarded. This is, to paraphrase a cliché, an offer you'll be delighted you accepted."
  -- Ken Bruen

NOVELS

• Frank Sinatra in a Blender (2011). Kindle it!

Preliminary report respectfully submitted by Kevin Burton Smith.