Beautiful Dreamers

Looney Tunes & Other Reality-Challenged Eyes

Personally, I think Bogie's to blame. And driving a cab may be a contributing factor, as well.

Gets plastic surgery to look like Bogart, and then sets himself up as a private eye.

After hallucinating a conversation with Bogie, this Thorazine-sucking Spokane cabbie and former mental patient decides to set himself up as a P.I.

A Scottish looney tune who escapes from the cracker factory to foil the plots of an assortment of imaginary villians. He thinks he is Bogie.

A forty-something cab driver and fan of detective fiction from Hicksville, Long Island, who suddenly snaps (after picking up a fare by the name of Charlie Flitcraft, for you Hammett fans) and thinks he's Red Diamond, a Race Williams-like private eye, straight out of the pulps.

Poor George. All he wants is to be Mike Hammer. He's already got the fedora, now if only he had the brains, the guts and the ability to focus.

Was he nuts? Or just eccentric? In Tenspeed and Brownshoe, a fondly remembered (but short-lived 1980 television show), Jeff Goldblum made his debut as the very naive, bored, terminally-square stockbroker who, with the aid of a motormouth con artist (Ben Vereen), made his fantasies of becoming a hardboiled private eye (just like his hero, Mark Savage) come true.

Fortunately Harry has a sizeable inheritance (and a gal Friday) to help him live out his fantasy as a hard-boiled dick.

Preliminary list respectfully compiled by Kevin Burton Smith.


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